Last of 2011...

Wow! I cannot believe that I am in the last hour of 2011! The older I get, the faster time goes! The day goes by slow, yet I look up, and it's time to get off work, go home, and prepare for the next day......then all of a sudden it's time for the weekend, then time for church on Sunday, then time to start a new week and start the routine all over again.

I am a 29 year old wife, daughter, sister, mama to my animals, aunt, cousin, step mom, friend, coworker, neighbor, role model......crazy to think one person can be so many different things to so many different people everyday.

Every year I look back on the things I have and have not done for the year. I always have regrets and things that I am proud of. I am the type of person that seems to focus more on the things that I have failed instead of the things that I have accomplished. So lets start with the things I have accomplished!

Things I have accomplished: now don't make fun of me, but I was able to get my blood drawn 2 times in one month. Now, I know that sounds retarded, but that is my main unreasonable fear in life, having blood drawn. The 1st time I did it, I went alone! That is like double brave, Lol. I was also able to train myself to run a 5k without stopping and I am NOT a runner. I didn't get any speeding tickets, lol. I have also managed to not wear the same outfit more than 2 times this year.....so vain, yet I am so proud, lol. I broke a habit of not wearing my seatbelt. So now every time I get in the car, I automatically put it on. I have been able to mentally not allow myself to have pride when it comes to apologizing to people. I heard a quote this year, more like a question, that made me put pride into perspective: "What is more important, your pride or the relationship?" When you say that out loud, it's kind of hard to not say you are sorry and mean it. I have broken myself of drinking soft drinks. In a world where giving up is the easiest option and applauded as "well, you gave it your best shot", I celebrated my 4th wedding anniversary with Ronnie. I have managed to not lose my mind in the commute from Dallas to Longview and back every week. I am sure there are other things that I am forgetting....

You know, I am reading back over everything that I consider little personal accomplishments, and I feel like I did nothing. I know that I could do so much more. At least more for other people and less for myself.

My 2011 Regrets: I could have held my tongue a lot more. I know I had many chances to be kinder to people in circumstances. I could have said "I love you" many more times than I did. DEFINATELY could have saved more money......well, no I pretty much needed all the clothes that I bought......I would have never been able to it wear the same thing more than twice! Lol. I know that I could have cussed less, thought less negative things about other people, been more patient, been more giving, more compassionate, more loving, and the list goes on and on! Good grief! What DID I do worth anything?!? Lol

I hate to have New Years Resolutions......why?.....well because it's so cliche! I am so NOT a cliche acting and speaking person. If its cliche, I want to go the other way, say the other thing, make a different impression. I also think that if I need to be doing it, why am waiting til January 1st to start? I don't want to be one of those people that say, "I am gonna go to the gym everyday!"....come on......really?......why start the year off as a liar to your own self....maybe .5% of those people actually keep that resolution.....and it's because they are a celebrity and they have an army of people making their food for them and cheering them on.....they don't live in reality and have to put their own socks on and wipe their own hiney. Lol. So I am not making any New Years Resolutions. I am going to make myself a few promises and goals that I should be doing everyday anyways.

My 2012 promises and goals: to be true to myself. That means a lot of different things.....for different instances and situations. I know in my heart what applies where and what I should be doing. I don't mean that I am picking myself over others.....that isn't what that means. Being true to myself means being true to the woman that I want to be known as. Being true to the legacy that I want to leave one day. I think I leave a mini legacy everyday to the people that I have contact with. I want those people to walk away from me thinking positive things, and hoping that they are that funny and good looking too! Jk LOL. I want to be consistent. I don't want to be that person that you never know what you are going to get. I want to be that woman that thrives under pressure and that you would never know about any hardships in my life. I also read a quote on pinterest....yes pinterest......at least I didn't say on some bathroom wall in some bar.....mainly because I don't remember the last time that I stepped into a bar.....but anyways....it went something like this: "Women are like tea bags, you never know how strong she is until she is put in hot water." I want to be a very potent tea bag. Lol. Not that I like hot water, but I want to know that I can make it no latter how hot or lukewarm the situation is.

Things that I am looking forward to in 2012: my brother getting married, gaining 2 sisters in the process, getting my motorcycle license....yeah I am a bada**, lol, finding out what is wrong with me (calm down, I meant the whole arthritis situation.....not mentally....that will remain a mystery), being able to get back to a normal active life, celebrating my 5th wedding anniversary, turning dirty 30 (lol), Bethany moving to Dallas, continuing to grow my relationship with ronnie, building good relationships with my new sisters, hopefully making some friends in Dallas, blah blah blah......

So I had to let the last post of the year be super boring.......so to make it up to you all, I will leave you with 2 photos that make me laugh.......enjoy!